Category Archives: Compassion

How To Hurt With Someone

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We pray for power. Maybe we ought to pray for compassion first because compassion paves the way for miracles

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I had one of those “pastor moments” recently. My pastor, Guy, and I visited a man in the hospital whose 20-month old son had just died.

I had already visited the little one twice when he was in the hospital at Reims and it was a heart-rending story. The little one had battled cancer almost from the beginning of his life. The family had fought, cried, prayed and done everything medically possible to see the little one live—even after the doctors counseled to let him go.

But Wednesday, the battled ended and Guy and I stood with the distraught father, looking at the earthly part of a little fellow who was now with the Lord. At times like this you can’t say a lot. You pray. You try to express your love. You philosophize about the meaning of life.

Your heart goes out to the tearful father. Part of you hurts. That’s called compassion. The root of this word, from what I’ve read, means “(com) together, (passus) to suffer, to feel pity.”

We enter other people’s suffering to help them carry it.

It’s hard to really hurt like others hurt. Guy and I hurt with that father and still do to some extent, but there’s no way that I hurt like that family hurts.

Usually, we have the most compassion for those people and things that are closest to us. How much time have you spent hurting for eastern Congo, lately? Nearly four million people have died there in the last six years.

“… Congo is the deadliest war the world has seen since the end of the Second World War, and … these staggering figures have gone largely ignored by the media and world leaders,” said Dr. Richard Brennan. (Associated Press Television News in New York)

If we happen to see a report on Congo in the media, we feel a twinge looking at those tortured faces and momentarily think how it would be if it were us and our kids hiding in the jungle. We breath a tiny prayer and flip to another channel to get lost in “Let’s Make A Deal.”

What can we do about it anyway?

One of the keys in Jesus’ healing ministry was His ability to feel what others felt. That compassion galvanized him into action.

An anonymous mom walked in a funeral procession next to the coffin of her dead son. Jesus came up on this scene and had the craziest reaction. “When Jesus saw her, his heart broke.” (from Luke 7, The Message). He didn’t even know her! But his deep-felt reaction was a key to the incredible thing that happened next.

“He said to her, ‘Don’t cry.’ Then he went over and touched the coffin. The pallbearers stopped. He said, “Young man, I tell you: Get up.” The dead son sat up and began talking. Jesus presented him to his mother.” (The Message)

Lazarus

Jesus stood before Lazarus and wept with the weeping family, though he knew He was going to do a miracle. Maybe he was weeping at their unbelief, but knowing Him, I can’t help but think he was entering into their suffering.

We pray for power. Maybe we ought to pray for compassion first because compassion paves the way for miracles, shoves us into action.

Jesus felt everything that touches us intimately. That’s how He was able to redeem us.

“Surely He has borne our griefs (sicknesses, weaknesses, and distresses) and carried our sorrows and pains [of punishment], yet we [ignorantly] considered Him stricken, smitten, and afflicted by God [as if with leprosy].” (Isa. 53:4, Amplified version)

Compassion drives us to action. Compassion gives passion to our prayer so that we can pray as an intercessor, instead of simply an uninterested bystander. An intercessor hurts with the hurting person. We feel for those who are going through pain that we have gone through.

Sometimes our pain prepares us for compassion.

God hears every request but I think He hears the broken-hearted prayer more clearly than any other. “The LORD is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.” (Ps. 34:18, NIV)

Often the Holy Spirit gives us compassion for people and situations that we don’t even know. He lets us feel so that we can pray with power and effectiveness. If we’re actually indifferent about the outcome, we probably won’t pray with faith.

One woman felt compelled of the Holy Spirit to get out of bed and intercede for the feet of a missionary haf a world away. What’s worse, she had read that the missionary was probably dead (long story there)

She obeyed and later this missionary came to her church, feet intact. At the time she was interceding, he had been trying to cross a high-mountain range to safety and his feet were nearly frozen. Her prayers made a difference.

People with faith really want what they’re praying about.

Do you dare to pray for compassion today? It will bring you to your knees seeking God. It will put you on your feet to see what you can do about the answer.

Real compassion–contrasted to a few tears that do us more good than anyone–real compassion makes all the difference in the world.

Hmmm…
“Bad times are good times for the Church. I would rather pastor in a crisis than in a boom any day. People are going to be more open to the good news in the next year and a half than in any other time in our lifetime.”        Rick Warren

Crybaby

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Check out our new podcast at the right of this page: “Three Keys for Negotiating the Present Crisis”

When you’re two you get the most mileage you can out of each little bobo. Sometimes we’re still doing that when we’re 22 and 52 and 82.

Some time ago Caleb, our two-year old grandchild number six (I had to stop and count), pulled some sort of furniture over on himself at church and got quite a scare. It hurt at first but fortunately it was more noise than actual damage and it earned him quite a bit of cuddling and loving from mama, while he cried the necessary number of tears. He finally decided that maybe he wasn’t going to die after all.

My wife happened to be visiting in the States at the time, and when she entered the room the rain clouds had nearly passed and the last few drops were falling. But when the tyke saw Grandma the tears and lamentations started up all again as he went to her for some additional comfort and tear drying.

Honestly, that condition lasts basically our whole life. But, as much as we love to be comforted, wouldn’t it be great to live in a world where nothing could hurt us?

Just these last few weeks a couple of friends lost their 38-year old son in a motorcycle accident; a teenage friend lost her mom to cancer; a pastor friend lost his wife and daughter in an automobile accident; and other friends’ son-in-law died of a heart attack.

Some of you may have lost your job or a lot of money on investments in the recent financial upheaval. Most homeowners have seen the value of their house nosedive or maybe even lost it. Family divisions plague others, while depression and frustration eat away at the foundation of so many lives.

Are you crying?

Would it surprise you to know that God is a weeping God? John remarked that “Jesus wept.” (John 11:35). He’s a God who sends crying men to preach “Remember that for three years I never stopped warning each of you night and day with tears,” Paul said. (Acts 20:30, NIV)

Would it shock you to know that He values tears so highly that he collects them in his bottle, and records them in His book? (Ps. 56:8) There are probably a lot of tears mixed into our intercessory prayers that are used in heavenly worship! (Rev. 8:4)!

God not only cries with us but He promised an age when all tears that spring from pain will be wiped away—and He will personally do the drying. The Lord promises this through Isaiah: “He will swallow up death forever. The Sovereign LORD will wipe away the tears from all faces; he will remove the disgrace of his people from all the earth. The LORD has spoken.” (Es. 25 :8).

He gives us a glimpse of the day that this happens through John : « I heard a voice thunder from the Throne: “Look! Look! God has moved into the neighborhood, making his home with men and women! They’re his people, he’s their God. He’ll wipe every tear from their eyes. Death is gone for good—tears gone, crying gone, pain gone—all the first order of things gone.” The Enthroned continued, “Look! I’m making everything new. Write it all down—each word dependable and accurate.” (Rev. 21:3-5, The Message)

But it’s not just in the future that the Lord Jesus dries tears. He’s busy doing it now just as he did when He walked on the earth. Once He encountered a widow, attending the funeral of her only son, “When Jesus saw her, his heart broke. He said to her, “Don’t cry.” (Luke 7:13, The Message)

Do you think God doesn’t suffer when you hurt? When He took your pains, sicknesses, and sins on his own back He felt it (Isaiah 53:4). When you bring what makes you cry to Him, He cries with you. But He also hears your prayer and begins to act in your behalf.

I think we’d be surprised if we could look at God and see how often tears stream down His face.

And He gives us the same heart of compassion for others and their needs. Real Christianity is a “crybaby” faith. As Jesus was touched by our pains, we’re touched by the pain of others and we respond, just like He responds to our pain.

Don’t be afraid to cry before Him. Bring your need to Him right now. He really does care. Earth is often a place of tears, but we are coming to a Kingdom where tears of pain will have no place. He’ll personally wipe them all away.

I have a strong feeling, though, that there will be tears in heaven– tears of joy.
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Hmmm…
“Earth’s crammed with heaven, and every common brush afire with God, But only he who sees takes off his shoes; The rest sit around it and pluck blackberries.” Elisabeth Barret Browing

The Unlevel Playing Field

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A leader talked about a certain situation to a group that I’m a part of. One part of the group could take advantage of the situation and the other, no. The leader noted, “You just have to accept that the playing field is not level.”

But, I didn’t want to accept an unlevel field—unless it was tilted to my advantage.

You know it’s funny. I was born in a free country and had a grandmother who loved the Lord Jesus and spoke to me about Him early in my life. I’ve had tough experiences, but on the whole my life has been easy.

Never lived through World War II or a depression that brought the world to its knees, like my dad’s generation.

Today, there’s a lady somewhere in the Darfour region of Sudan who had to run for her life. Evil men wanted to rape and kill her and her family. She’s living in a make-do refugee camp and wonders what will become of her in the future while grieving her past.

She’s never really heard the Gospel, and the way things stand, she’ll never hear it as clearly as I have.

Wow! I’d say that the playing field isn’t level. Why am I so blessed that I have to discipline myself not to eat everything I want, and she has to live on handouts? Why are my kids doing well in life while some of hers were murdered?

Why have I had the inestimable privilege of hearing about the Lord Jesus Christ, and hard men keep this news from her?

Maybe, I ought to be excited about the blessings that I have instead of complaining about what others have that I don’t.

“That servant who knows his master’s will and does not get ready or does not do what his master wants will be beaten with many blows. But the one who does not know and does things deserving punishment will be beaten with few blows. From everyone who has been given much, much will be demanded; and from the one who has been entrusted with much, much more will be asked.” (Luke 12:47, 48, NIV)

There’s an excellent chance that I’m going to have to report to the Lord about how I used my advantage–whether to fatten myself up or to heal others.

If the field is tilted in my direction, I better be scoring more points. I better do something positive with my advantages. Is there anything I can do to level up the playing field? Can I help those who are on the low end of the field, because it sure looks like it’s tilted from here.

Tilted in my direction.
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Hmmm…

“What we are determines what we see. What we see determines how we act.” (Haddon Robinson? quoted by Joseph Dimitrov).

The Pacifier and Compassion

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Check out the interview on our website with David Wilkerson from October 2007 in which he speaks directly to the financial crisis that he felt was coming. Look to the right on this page at click on Victoire magazine-English

The Pacifier

(A true story)
Once upon a time in a church somewhere in the world, an infant of about 15 months stood next to his mother on a church bench, a pacifier covering a good percentage of his innocent face.

This pacifier held a powerful place in the life of the child. Touch his pacifier and he might break your arm (or at least your ears!)

Everyone else faced forward, more or less singing, but he looked towards the rear of the church, which was more interesting. The song-leader wasn’t very happy with the way the people warbled that morning and he fussed at them a bit.

The song-leader’s wife sat just behind our pacifier baby and she wasn’t in a sweet mood. There’s a good chance that she and the song-leader had had words before they arrived at the service. When he scolded the assembly, she puffed up and said, “Well, I wouldn’t sing now if he asked me to!”

The baby looked at her seriously, then took out his pacifier and offered it to her. “I don’t want that thing!” she huffed.

But my friend, that’s compassion! The little fellow knew the comfort that he received from his rubber stogy and he was willing to let her have a smack or two, if that would comfort her!

Do You Need Comfort?

A baby can’t understand the forces that troubled those two people but he tried to comfort her with what comforted him.
That’s what so good about Jesus. He knows how to comfort us because He’s been through it all, and He always gives us help perfectly adapted to our hurts.

“Don’t be so naive and self-confident. You’re not exempt. You could fall flat on your face as easily as anyone else. Forget about self-confidence; it’s useless. Cultivate God-confidence. No test or temptation that comes your way is beyond the course of what others have had to face. All you need to remember is that God will never let you down; he’ll never let you be pushed past your limit; he’ll always be there to help you come through it.” (1 Cor. 10 :12, 13, The Message)

Once I was thinking about Isaiah 53 :4 : “Surely He has borne our griefs (sicknesses, weaknesses, and distresses) and carried our sorrows and pains [of punishment], yet we [ignorantly] considered Him stricken, smitten, and afflicted by God [as if with leprosy]. (Amplified version)

I believe the Lord spoke to me. “David, you know when you hurt and you come to me and you say, ‘Lord, it hurts!’ I know exactly what you’re feeling because when I went to the Cross, I took that very pain on myself. I’ve already felt it and I understand exactly what you feel.”

Sometimes we can’t understand someone else’s pain because we’ve never felt it.

When I was a young pastor in the United States one of the ladies in the church had had an operation for breast cancer. She later joined a group that tried to help ladies who had this operation.

“The first time that I went into a hospital room and I saw that woman in the bed, I knew exactly what she felt,” she told me.

And if we struggle with the burden of sin guilt, or sickness, or the pain of life, Jesus understands perfectly. He’s felt that pain.

The horror of the Cross weighed far more than the physical tortures that Jesus endured. God’s Son experienced the horror of every sin ever committed, of all our sicknesses, and all our suffering.

He never sinned but He carried all that horrible nastiness on Himself.

But the wonder of the Cross explodes with this truth—He understands! He know how to help.

“ Therefore, since we have a great high priest who has gone through the heavens, Jesus the Son of God, let us hold firmly to the faith we profess. For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are—yet was without sin. 16Let us then approach the throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.” (Heb. 4:14, 15, NIV)

If you’re hurting, why don’t you go to Jesus and tell Him.

He understands. He knows how to help.

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Hmmm…

The truth is, everyone lives by faith. The only difference between Christian faith and non-Christian faith is the object of our faith.” Neil Anderson

Sheepherder of the Autobahn

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To see a few pictures of the adventure described below, click on this link:
http://picasaweb.google.com/davidporter55/SheepOnAutobahn

I thought you might be interested to learn that I’ve started a second career on the side. I’ve become a sheepherder. But not just any kind of sheepherder—I herd sheep on the autobahn in Germany.

Let me explain.

The last two weeks we were in Luxembourg filling in for a pastor on vacation, and taking advantage of our presence there to visit some of our old haunts. When we lived in the Grand Duchy, we loved to slip across the border into Germany and follow the Moselle river up to the city of Cochem. The Moselle follows a picturesque valley of vineyards, forests, and well-tended villages and cities, some with buildings dating back a half millennium or more. Makes me feel as if I’m in a storybook.

This time we decided to go directly to Cochem, spend the night, and follow the river back the next day. So that’s how we found ourselves hurtling up the autobahn, when suddenly traffic slowed, then stopped. What was the problem? As we looked ahead on the road we were shocked to see a little flock of sheep that had wandered onto our two lanes. A few seconds more and there would have been lamb chops flying in all directions (probably hubcaps and fenders as well).

Now they were huddling together in fear as traffic came to a halt just in front of them. I passed and pulled off to the side to help a few others who tried to herd them back towards the guardrail. That was no problem. The problem was that the fleecy airheads didn’t seem to grasp that they could bend down just a little and pass underneath, just as they had done to enter the dangerous area.

Sprechen sie deutsch?

One of my fellow shepherds was telephoning and she jabbered something to me in German. I have an extensive German vocabulary. It consists of “Jah!” and I usually say it a lot while shaking my head “yes” when I’m in Germany. No, actually I can do a bit better than that. I think she was calling the police and asking me what the closest town was. “Jah!”

Finally, though, the deed was done and our hairy intruders passed to the other side of the rail. I felt like “Babe.”

“Well done, pig.”

You know what amazed me? It was the lack of complaint of the huge traffic jam of people who waited patiently while we “Little Bo Peeped” the sheep out of the road. No honking. No yelling. No signs of impatience. There just seemed to be a lot of compassion for those poor, lost sheep. But I ask you, were those sheep so worthy of compassion?

A bit farther up the autobahn we saw a huge herd of sheep in a field next to the road on the other side. That was probably where our little varmints came from. I tried to imagine what had happened. “Hey guys. We’re never going to find anything fresh to eat here,” a rare leader among them might have said. “There’s thousands of us. And these others keep tromping on my grass. It’s kind of stomach turning when you try to eat it. I’m getting out of here.”

“Are you sure it’s alright?” blink nine other sheep nearby who hear him. “Sure, I saw a gap that leads to the best pastures you could ever dream of back up yonder. Come on follow me. Let’s get out of here while no one is looking.”

“Well, if you say so …”

So there go ten sheep, slinking away from the multitude. Sneak, sneak. “Baaaaaah!” “Shut up!” Sneak, sneak, sneak. “Baaaah!” “Be quiet.”

Until finally they pass through an opening under the autobahn and end up, you know where. I ask you, did they really deserve our compassion?j

When we finally arrived in Cochem, I saw a tourist bus that was evidently lost and had tried to turn into a narrow street. Traffic was partially blocked and at least two of the motorists gave the harried bus driver an impatient, “hoooonk!” as they made their way around him. “People have more compassion for sheep than they do for each other,” I remarked to my wife.

Unfortunately that’s true. I read an article in the paper this week and the columnist talked about the cruel way some animals are kept in a tiny cage before they are slaughtered for our tables. I agreed but couldn’t help but think that this same man would favor taking the lives of unborn babies. Hmmm…

Some men’s hearts are touched when they see a lady crying from frustration in a movie but they explode in anger when their own wife weeps. Some ladies are ready to give their favorite movie stars a second chance but they don’t extend the same favor to the person that they’ve pledged to live their lives with. Some people are all smiles to those they work with and all frowns to those they live with.

We suffer from selective compassion. I’m glad God isn’t like that, aren’t you? He wants to express His character through us:

“Make a clean break with all cutting, backbiting, profane talk. Be gentle with one another, sensitive. Forgive one another as quickly and thoroughly as God in Christ forgave you.” (Ephesians 4: 31-32, The Message).

“So, chosen by God for this new life of love, dress in the wardrobe God picked out for you: compassion, kindness, humility, quiet strength, discipline. Be even-tempered, content with second place, quick to forgive an offense. Forgive as quickly and completely as the Master forgave you. And regardless of what else you put on, wear love. It’s your basic, all-purpose garment. Never be without it.” (Col. 3:12-14, The Message).

If you live that way you’ll be smarter than a sheep.
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Hmmm…

“We look at our watches; God looks at the calendar.” Andy Stanley