Category Archives: aging

Five Steps To Reclaiming Your Dream

Posted on by
Reply

You probably know by now that I like to talk about dreams

The other morning my wife came into my office talking about this weird dream she had had the night before. She told a disjointed story that would have crossed a statues eyes with its strangeness.

Then I told her about a dream that I had had which had something to do about bombing a city. With others I had debated whether it was right, because many civilians would be killed. Then the scene fast forwarded and I was flying above the city. I say, “I”, because I wasn’t in an airplane.

I was flying.

Down below I saw a one of our soldiers running trying to get away and an enemy chasing him. So I positioned myself in flight and was going to try to spit on the head of the bad guy so as to distract him and give my friend an advantage. It was going to take a big spit.

Rough night.

Dreams!

There is a kind of dream, though, that can motivate your life. We also call them visions, hopes, goals, etc. You’re never too young to dream. Young Jeremiah protested God’s dream for his life. “Hold it , Master God! Look at me. I don’t know anything. I’m only a boy!” (Jeremiah 1, The Message).

God used him anyway.

Old man Moses creaked around on 80-year old joints at the back side of the desert. When God gave him the dream of leading Israel out of Egypt he responded sincerely, “Send someone else!”

All the same, the dream eventually inspired the octogenarian to do exploits for God.

Those great “theologians” Simon and Garfunkle once sang a song about two old friends, sitting on a park bench. Sad music accompanied words that sang of being surprised at being 70 years old now and all they had left was their memories.

Made me want to cry. Is that all there is to look forward to? Paul Simon was 27, I think, when he wrote that song.

Someone said that old age begins when your memories take the place of your dreams. Honestly, though, some young people have gotten “old” because bitterness or disappointment or doubt or fear or all kinds of things have taken the place of their hopes—their dreams.

How do you get your dream back? Eat a lot of pizza at 11 p.m.? Nah, try this.

*Start looking to the Lord. Get your eyes on Him and not on your hurts, problems or memories. Nehemiah the wall builder inspired some tired, dirty people with his words: “I looked [them over] and rose up and said to the nobles and officials and the other people, Do not be afraid of the enemy; [earnestly] remember the Lord and imprint Him [on your minds], great and terrible, and [take from Him courage to] fight for your brethren, your sons, your daughters, your wives, and your homes.” (Nehemiah 4:14, Amplified version)

*Don’t limit your dream because of age—too young, too old—or because of whatever you perceive would stop you. If your dream really comes from God, He delights in providing what you need to accomplish it. Read His Word to refresh His promises in your heart, then act on that faith.

*Find others to help you accomplish it. It’s rare that a God dream happens to one person alone. God-sized dreams often span generations and involve many people. Don’t be afraid to let others share your dream. Don’t use and manipulate them to accomplish your dream. Inspire them to have a part in the dream God has given you.

*If you don’t have a dream God might want you to enter someone else’s dream and help him accomplish it. The dream is God’s, whoever has it. When we enter it, it becomes ours, too. You need a dream. Find God’s dream for you.

*Hang out with dreamers and be a person who “infects” others with dreams instead of sourness and doubt. Listen to what I received recently from some motivated friends, all over 60 years old: “Hey, Dave! Dream big, because our God is even bigger and He can help you accomplish even more.” H. and K. And, “The point of it all, Dave, is to finish well.  May that be said of both of us.” M.

God-dreams … or memories, disappointments and self-pitying tears? What film plays in the theater of your mind? What motivates you?

Just a thought. Paul Simon who wrote, “Old Friends,” turns 70 this year. I wonder if he’s dreaming or remembering. And I wonder if those 70-year old friends on the park bench seem as old to him now as they did when he was 27.
_______________________________

Hmmm…

“There is a huge storm coming, Israel. Get out of the way.” Thomas Friedman writing in the New York Times.

Thoughts On Aging (Yawn!)

Posted on by
Reply

There’s a discussion about the spiritual significance of the current crisis on this site at the right. Click on “You speak out”
It seems incredible to me that I struggled with turning 30. I thought I was getting old, but now I realize that lots of thirty-year olds are still at the peachfuzz stage.

A little word to those of you turning 30. Don’t sweat it. You really are young. Enjoy it.

For those of you turning forty though, I can’t be quite as optimistic. If the average person lives around eighty years, the day of your fortieth birthday, you’re half dead. I did struggle with that one but God helped me. I awoke on that day with a joy! I remember thinking, “If this is it, and I have to die today, it’s been good.”

But when you cross the forty barrier you enter into the second half of your life and things definitely change.

And 50?

I kept waiting for the joy on my fiftieth birthday. I’m still waiting eight years later. It was more a sense of resignation. It’s coming. What are you going to do? Just enjoy it.

One thing though, as you get older there is a feeling of movement and things speed up instead of slowing down. When I was ten, it seemed that five years passed from December 25 to December 25 each year. Now it seems more like five months.

Used to, I couldn’t wait for my next birthday. Now, I have no problems waiting. It’s seems I’m on a conveyer belt that pushes me forwards, whether I want to or not. Only, when I look in the mirror, it doesn’t seem I’m going forward. Things are getting worse!

Wouldn’t it be great if you could get get to the age you want to be and stop? And you’re hair would stop growing and grass would stop growing? And you’d always look the same. It would uncomplicate things considerably, wouldn’t it?
Honestly, though, not reaching the next year isn’t very appealing either, wrinkles or not.

Now sixty is looming up the road. I’ve still got one to go to get prepared but it’s difficult to know what to expect. When I was younger I used to look 10 or 15 years ahead and choose someone I admired, and try to pattern myself after him.

If I look 15 years ahead now, I just see even more gray hair and wrinkles. A French pastor’s wife showed me a picture of herself and her husband when they were young. They looked like movie stars.

Now they’re well past retirement age and her comment was, “I don’t know why we have to get so ugly.” (Speak for yourself m’aam).

This process of moving through life is a scary business. Is there a Christian perspective to this journey, because journey it is.

“Stalwart walks in step with GOD;
his path blazed by GOD, he’s happy.
If he stumbles, he’s not down for long;
GOD has a grip on his hand.

I once was young, now I’m a graybeard—
not once have I seen an abandoned believer,
or his kids out roaming the streets.
Every day he’s out giving and lending,
his children making him proud,”
Says Eugene Peterson in his Message paraphrase of Psalms 37:23-26.

A key, I think, is to think. Identify the challenges of each age. I exhorted you thirty-year olds to enjoy being young, and you should (Noticed, I exhorted you, instead of just telling you. That sounds more preachery) . But the challenges I faced at thirty were just as great, maybe greater, than those I face now. I’m responsible for my wife and myself—then I had three kids at home.

And honestly, thirty years olds don’t have to wait to be effective for the Lord. Some of the most dynamic people I’ve know are marking their world in their thirties, or even their twenties.

So …

Try to get help— by applying the principles of God’s Word; by watching others who’ve just passed where you’re headed; by using the faith that you’ve received to be victorious in the age you are now,  and to be victorious in the age you will be.

Read, pray hard, believe, talk and ask counsel.

The same God who gives you wisdom to raise children, will give you wisdom to negotiate the empty nest into the next phase of your life. The God who caused fruit to grow in your life in middle age will help you be fruitful, even in old age.

The key is to trust Him, to engage with him at each point on the trip. Constantly check your heavenly GPS to make sure you’re not getting off track. Grow in your love and faithfulness to Him by the power of the Spirit.

I’m not saying you’re going to be shouting for joy about gray hair but a recent study seemed to indicate that many people in their 60’s are the happiest of all the groups surveyed. (Especially those who don’t have to rise early to go to work).

I guess you call that, “Going out with a bang!”

Hopefully “out” is a longtime up the road and younger people will have to work longer to pay social security taxes to support those of us who are still kicking at 120.
___________________________________

Hmmm …
“People are grieving. There was a death. Their money died.”
(BARBARA GOLDSMITH, a semiretired psychotherapist in Delray Beach, Fla. in NY Times)